Confession: I don’t like photo sets.
‘it’s not cold’ said the PE teacher with a coat on
“running for 20 minutes isn’t that bad”, said the PE teacher from the chair
‘you’ve got to stay healthy’ said the PE teacher eating a mars bar
“Being on your period is no excuse.” said the male PE teacher with no uterus
"Smoking is bad," the PE teacher whispered through her smoker’s cough.
Amped up for a crazy weekend with these two goons. A much needed vacation with two of my best friends @seancooney1 @danlidwin. Let the shinanigans begin!
It’s really late right now, but I can’t sleep. I just spent about an hour looking through old text messages that we sent back and forth to each other. I never realized how many times my texts began with “Hey dad, sorry I’ve been really busy.”
Secretly, I’m holding onto a lot of regret. I haven’t been a very good son to you. Selfish is putting it mildly, maybe negligent is a better word. I don’t think a day goes by since you got sick that I don’t think about how much I ignored you in the past. I wish that I had picked up the phone every time you called, even if it was just for five minutes a day.
I am so scared to lose my dad. I’m scared to run into moments in my life, and for my first thought to be, “I should call my dad”, before I realize that I can’t. I feel like I’ve already lost you because you spend so much of your time frustrated at the condition you’re in. You feel so far away and I hate it. I miss you dad. I miss you and you’re not even gone.
The silence in the room hurts. I know you can’t help it, I know that you can hardly talk, and that if you could, you would. But it still hurts because I feel like I’m staring at you through prison walls. I can see in your eyes that you’re screaming inside, trying to get everyone’s attention, but we can’t understand what you’re saying.
I guess this is what I deserve. This is the lesson I am forced to learn. I don’t think God made this happen just to teach me a lesson, but I’m learning a lesson anyway. Never miss an opportunity to pick up the phone. Answer the text. Call your dad and tell him you love him.
I love you.
Am I far away?
Do I inch closer every day?
Or do I drink my rivers,
Drag my feet, and drown in my dreams?
Is it as bad as it seems?